Teaching An Old Dog New Tricks

So my self imposed vacation is going to be done soon. My birthday is coming up and I’ve managed to get a bunch of stuff done in my absence in the workforce. As much as I would love to stay like this, I need to get back to earning those benjamins, lol – I want a new drumset. ūüėõ

I’m planning to go do a minimalist “bushcrafting” for a weekend, just looking for spots where I don’t have to go far out of the city but far enough from the city, and traffic, so I can have some peace of mind. I’m just looking for foresty spots where I can hide out, lol.

Anyways, I started looking at jobs at the market; what am I qualified for and what I am over qualified for. I would love to start at the bottom again but my resume is looking to qualified – over the decade and the half of being in the machine, I excelled at it. Started as a cashier, became a supervisor; started as a cook, became a shift manager, started in data entry, became a manager, warehouse person to logistics coordinator to operations manager.

You get the idea, I’m the typical over achiever.

A decade and a half of that and I would really just want a relaxing 9 to 5 job. In retrospect, it was very mentally and physically taxing to some extent, to do these managerial jobs day in and day out. My last gig, I was dreading every day thinking what kind of fuckupness will happen that day, what kind of lie would I need to produce to smoothen things out, who is gonna try to give me flack so in turn, I can scream at them, etc etc.

So I look at the jobs I want, and the jobs that I an qualified for, and how far they are from where I live (I’m not willing to trek far for a job) – these are the variables I look at but when I look at jobs that I think are “beneath” me, I get a sense of anxiety and dread.

I don’t actually feel that there are jobs beneath me nor do I believe I feel entitled to judge a person by their occupation, that I think I am higher than them, we do what we can with what we have – it’s my ego, it thinks that I should be working in a higher station since I’ve already reached that height and I shouldn’t go lower anymore, as well the money is pretty low in comparison to what¬†my standard has been as of late ($35+ an hour down to $12ish).

Well, the thing is, when I look at those high end jobs, I also feel that anxiety and dread. The mind and body remembers all the pain and crap I had to go through during those tenures.

So in conclusion, I am confused as to how I should go about it?

Now that I wrote this all down, and somewhat has a coherent sense of what I am thinking – I now feel it is stupid that I am even going through those motions.

First off, there is no guarantee that I’ll get the job. Secondly, I always start at the bottom and work my way to the top.

Keep It Simple Stupid, and remember how you get by in life anyways, charge in recklessly.

It hasn’t failed you yet!

Brain Magick – Optimization Ideas

I like to talk about the “romantic” altruistic side of magickal development in my blog but who doesn’t, and we should probably all strive for some semblance of that in our lives.¬†However, I do like my sorcery and the practical side of magick.

It would be nice to be able to read peoples mind, influence them with a spoken sentence, make yourself disappear from their perception but to be honest, I am ok with working with what I’ve got, and improving and developing them through the help of magick. Besides, instead of trying to achieve those “cool” things, working on the things I’ve already got are actually more practical and will be able to help me to achieve certain things¬†–¬†the cool stuff can come in after.

Yesterday, I was inspired to create an “analytical” servitor, wanted to boost my processing speeds and optimize the way I am learning and applying myself. I was ready to perform my working when I realize something – why do I need to create a servitor when all I really need is to optimize my brain?¬†After realizing that “duh” moment, I set on to plan what I want to achieve.

This is not something new, I’m always trying to optimize my brain for effectiveness. It’s a weird sense of feeling, I feel like I am part of my body but I am not part of my body – like a pilot whose cockpit is the brain, and I’m hacking away with what I’ve got, modifying and refining.

So a couple of ideas I would like to achieve in this endeavour;

  • Limiter Release:¬†I’ve always heard that our body is capable of doing great feats of strength and that our brain has a “limiter” on it so that we are only using a low percentage of what we can do. I’ve also heard that our body is not able to handle the strain thus will incapacitate us in a great duration of a time to recover.Since I also employ strength training, (I am particularly weak at the moment, I need to get those numbers up, I’ve only gotten back to seriously training and at my strongest, I was only lifting 200+ lbs) I was thinking to train my body to be able to withstand around 400+ lbs of weight, maybe 500+lbs (the basic movements; deadlift, squat, bench, etc) and then release the limiter so that I can lift to 600+ lbs (I don’t know the percentage of that type of strength in comparison to my potential unlocked strength). I mainly want to achieve this so I can achieve an explosive force of strength.

    Limiter Release is such an interesting idea. I assume with the¬†premise above, that it applies in our actual brains processing speeds as well, and that we are only doing a certain amount of speed to avoid wear and tear, over heating, etc. I imagine an unlocked brain similar to those “bullet” time moments we always seem to have in regards to near death experiences, or Action Man like analytical system.

  • Full Body Control:¬†Full control of your bodies functions; from healing, to strengthening, etc. I’ve been toying with increasing my brains synapses to increasing my metabolic rate but the gist of it is that since the brain is the control hub, and gaining full control of this hub, which controls your bodily process consciously and subconsciously, you are able to control the many process our body does.The variable that¬†I worry about when I do this, like for example, forcefully increasing the speed of digestion or increasing blood flow towards a certain part of the body or increase adrenaline, my lack of knowledge of biology and the fact that the body is working in synch as it is, I don’t know the type of side effects that can occur. For example, I was trying to speed up my digestion and I thought that digestion occurs due to the stomach acids and if I can increase the amount or potency, it will go faster – then I thought what kind of side effects would occur? Would my stomach lining be able to handle it, would I end up bursting my stomach?
  • Total Recall:¬†Pretty straightforward. The ability to memorize everything, and be able to recall in full detail that memory.
  • Analytical Speed: Increase the way I analyse and process information.
  • Reptilian Brain:¬†Give more control to this part of the brain. I tend to be too intellectual, and too inside of my brain at times and I would like to give more control to this part of the brain, especially on things I am not too comfortable with – like social events I am uncomfortable with, or dealing with aggression. I feel like my reptilian brain is in control during the times when I am in physical competition, and I don’t mind it that way¬†–¬†now to harness it for my advantage.

Now, these are all ideas and theories that I am working on and would like to achieve.

The science isn’t exactly exact and the magick part is going to be funky at most but¬†I’ve had success though with increased healing, increased temporary strength, been able to grow hair on a certain spot – I’ve experienced that “clarity” or soft zone, as the sportys’ would say, numerous times.

Think of the possibilities.

Zepar Conjuration – Failure To Launch

So…..nothing happened w/ the request I asked Zepar to accomplish.

The practical side of me would just move on with another entity, maybe it just was not meant to be, maybe we weren’t compatible, the stars wasn’t aligned – but that was not was this endeavour was all about.

I have my theories on how magick work and how to affect it to achieve results in the microcosm and I wanted to explore and experiment and execute, the result was just the icing on the cake.

Now with the same principles I use in life, I have to review, analyze, refine, and try again.

So in review.

  • I only used Zepars word of power and seal, mainly energy work, no materia used.
  • I got confirmation that I contacted the correct entity, that results would happen within¬†2 weeks, and that no devotionary practice and offerings would be required.
  • No lust of result variable I found, to be honest. It was quite easy with this one. I wasn’t as vested as I thought I would’ve been.

What could’ve have happened that this didn’t go as planned?

  • I didn’t connect with the correct entity. My divination is pretty good, I would’ve gotten signs if that wasn’t the case.
  • I didn’t use the right amount of energy.¬†Possible, I am planning to increase “potency”.
  • Materia is needed for a successful conjuration:¬†Possible but I am hoping not. I’ve seen so many people succeed with minimal to no materia that it bunks that theory for me. Maybe it’s needed for “demonic” entities. Again, I’ve seen enough proof that people can achieve results so I am going with my former working theory.
  • The entity lied to me.¬†Quite extremely possible and something that I’ve thought of, since it is in their nature. I didn’t want to come off all authoritarian in my rituals, I was hoping I didn’t need to pull that card but maybe I will.
  • Personal variables.¬†Maybe I wasn’t focused enough. Maybe I was actually lusting for results more that what’ve I’ve noticed. I don’t think so though, I’ve been doing this for awhile now, I know when I am not in the game, I have better control of my mental faculties so I would know if¬†I was lusting for results.
  • External variables. Maybe there was no way for me to achieve results. This could be the case on the extreme basis; like maybe my timing was off and she’s not even in the same country or dying but I haven’t heard of any of this, and if that was the case – Zepar shouldn’t have given me a time frame.
  • Spherical variables.¬†Maybe I am biting more that I can chew. Historically, my success with seduction magick is not very good. For other people, I do ok but personal seduction magick, success is not something I can brag about – not like money magick per se. I’ve been failing at personal seduction magick since my high school conjuration of Aphrodite, lol.

The¬†goal(s) is to be able to connect with entity with minimal ritual and materia,¬†that’s why I chose to do this ritual this way, that’s the whole goal of my sorcery in general.

Heavily influenced by Hemetics (Bardon), Chaos Magick (Hine),¬†Postmodern Magic, Demonaltry¬†&¬†Strategic Sorcery. That’s why I enjoy NAP so much, no materia needed; just connect and results occur.

So I am going to go at it again, what should I be doing to refine my next conjuration to increase my success ratio?

  1. I will be keeping the same motif; no materia, seal and words of power.
  2. I increasing the “potency” of the chthonic energies I weave when performing the conjuration.
  3. I will skip the divination confirmation part.
  4. I will perform the conjuration in the traditional cycle of repetition for a couple of days and wait for results.
  5. I might include the power of Lucifer in this run. I was hoping I didn’t have to work it this way but maybe in the initial runs, I should and eventually wean off when I have confirmation of success.

In regards to my weakness on this type of magick, I am a firm believer that any skill can be advanced as long as you are invested for success. So I understand that I might suck at this but it doesn’t mean I can’t get better at it. Just like I suck at astral projection, I will crawl and scratch my way to success, I just have to be smart about it. (lol, thank you “art of learning” for reinforcing this idea to me).

I am probably going to go for another run at it tonight, with the variables and revisions I have talked about in place.

Wish me luck.

 

Elemental King Conjuration – Djinn

I already decided that I was going to work with the elemental kings more to elevate and expand my knowledge on elemental magick.

There isn’t alot of writings in the interwebs in regards to working with them, just tidbits of general notes regarding them but no field reports or discussions, so research on them was quick but not alot of details to work with.

I chose to work primarily with their seals, a pre made rite I found which I trimmed down to a couple of sentences and vocalization of their names.

I started the ritual, gathered energy and executed my zone rite.

[SIDENOTE: My zone rite is pretty flexible so I can gather and accumulate different types of magickal forces just from that one module; I just change the symbolism here and there and it works great. Quite proud of it, lol.]

So with the zone rite, I focused more on accumulating and gathering the fire element till I was satisfied with what I feel.¬†I stumbled through the rite, I will probably edit it to a custom one I will write as I did not like how it flowed out. You would think I would’ve done some sort of pre-check but to be honest, I thought it was ok when I was reading through it but when I was actually executing it – it just was not right.

I vocalised his name and visualized his seal on fire and within a couple of seconds, my vision was filled with fiery waves, there was images that I couldn’t understand or see past the fire. There seemed to be alot happening but not alot as well. It was very interesting;¬†the feeling that I got, even though I couldn’t figure out what I was “seeing”, I felt chaos..like neutral chaos rather than chaotic evil.

I did my acknowledgement ritual and dispelled my zone to end the night.

A couple of things I wanted to work on the next time I do the conjuration;

  • Energy flow was not that good. It kept going up and down, it felt like I needed to work harder to control the energies. I just finished a rough workout and my diet was probably out of whack due to eating crappy food that day but I wasn’t very solid with the energy work.
  • The rite was awkward, I’ll probably rewrite the rites that I have currently.
  • Vocalization was not that good either.

I feel like I need to restore myself with another ritual, a proper one. I just didn’t feel that it was up to par, even though I tried very hard, it still came out half assed.

I’m not sorry that it came out this way, but I am disappointed it happened that way. It’s like being a celebrity to meet your number #1, only to be underwhelmed and disappointed.

Brain Magick

The brain itself is probably one of the most important parts, and aspects, of life – and of magick.

The way I see it, the brain is the computer that comes with the default OS (Win 7) and software – within that software, you can do plenty of hacks and tricks with it. As society and the world develops its knowledgebase, so does our default software – back then we were in DOS, command lines and batch files, now we are in Windows 10 especially catered to the current lifestyle.

By default, you already have something powerful that can store and process lots of information, analyse patterns, calculate complex problems, create art and music, modify your body to your wishes and achieve strength, speed, and agility. With a variety of software (specific training), ¬†you can be whatever and whoever you want to be¬†–¬†and that is besides the hidden processes your brain does for you automatically (like breathing).

And then we find magick; magick is hackers OS flavour of choice because if we choose to, we can get to every nook or cranny of the system, or just be a casual user who likes to surf the WWW – we still have the option to access admin level work.

Similar to development cycles, we started off with UNIX command line and its flavours (Goetia, Witchcraft) to UBUNTU and the many flavours it comes with (IIH, NAP, Kaos Magick, Postmodern Magick).

Installing the magick software grants us different modules to work with, in a much more open sourced, line by line coding level. We can download programs, or create our own programs. The more we work with it, our OS and hardware gets upgraded kinda like overclocking your processor or streamlining your code to be more memory efficient.

Our brains are still unknown territory at this point but it is amazing. With the default software installed in it, we can already achieve levels of feats a magickian can only dream of. With this default OS, think of the many technological advancements we achieved throughout history

Now, upgrading to an open software, think of the potential we can work to achieve.

Specialized Mastery

I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times.

Simon @ Trainee Golem Builder recently recommended a book to me called “Mastery” by George Leonard.

This was recommended to me already a time ago but to be honest, just never got around to it because there has been so many more modern takes on the subject and I just ended up reading¬†those¬†instead. I finished reading it today and for the most part, the book is on point but since I’ve read other materials already, it’s nothing new – the only thing I probably didn’t like is his definition of a “hacker” (he might’ve as well used the term “slacker” in his terminology).

Mastery, by definition, is learning a system/methodology by the book and having the skills to implement it. Playing a song note by note is mastery, being able to perform a Karate Kata perfectly is mastery, being able to completely read a person is psychological mastery over someone, taking the Hoodoo correspondence class and using those teachings to effectively perform workings is mastery.

I’ve had a very interesting journey with this thing called “mastery”. All of my life, since I was a kid, to strive for mastery was something that has been ingrained to me.

Going to school and reaching #1 in our class for all those years, being accepted into an “accelerated” class because normal classes were too slow for me and I was classified as “gifted”. From learning how to play basketball, volleyball, tennis, breakdancing, krumping, karate, judo, boxing¬†&¬†self-defense. From playing guitar, to learning and hacking computers, to learning how to juggle, to magick and sorcery. My life is littered with things that I achieved and things that I failed at.

Notice though that I didn’t mentioned I mastered any of this things above…

I admit, I’m not one to master something for the sake of mastery, I prefer to be effective – to me, that is what mastery is. That’s why I’m a sorcerer, that’s why I’m a hacker, I now live in a very “specialized” way of mastery. (And that’s why I had an issue with how the term “hacker” was used in the book.)

Bruce Lee &¬†Tim Ferriss are the pioneers of what I call “specialized mastery”. ¬†These guys threw out the idea of mastering a system for the sake of mastery but for the sake of being effective instead.

For all intents and purposes, my Jeet Kune Do is very different from Bruce Lees JKD; mine is going to be hands heavy, with lots of throws, alot more infighting and midrange, elbows and knees. Bruce would be more mid to long range but can fight close if needed, alot more variety  and technique, close out the fight with some sort of power strike.

Tim Ferriss has built most of his life, hacking away at things and specializing in certain ways to take advantage of a position and eventually achieve results. One of the stories of his success was taking advantage of a loophole to become a TKD champion.

With me, when I play basketball, even though I am big and tall, I never liked playing the forward position¬†–¬†I always preferred the point guard/shooting guard position since those were my strengths; I love shooting the ball, I love dishing out cool assists, and I love shutting down my opponent. I’m not very fast (I was deceptively fast, lol, it’s an illusion that utilizes my length and my dash speed) and I’m not a fancy ball handler but I used what I have to put my team to advantageous positions and eventually win ball games.

Throughout the years, these “jack of all trades” types of people has been looked down upon by people or at least, has a stigma on them because while they are good at something, they’ve never actually mastered the system. To my point, these “jacks” are not so one-dimensional as people portray them to be, while they “mastered” one aspect of the system and utilized it to their advantage, we all put in the time and effort to learn the other aspects of the system, it’s just we chose to boost the strengths we have to be more effective.

Don’t get me wrong, there is a beauty in a way that someone who has mastered a system and made it their own. Word can’t describe it, it just has to be enjoyed and worshipped but like anything in the world, there are many paths to achieve mastery and they put in the work just like everyone else.

By definition, I would be a master of none but nonetheless, I would be very effective in a wide variety of situations with the skill set that I’ve amassed. I might not be able to play Canon in D note by note, vibrato by vibrato but I sure can hell play it loud, overdriven with plenty of wah- wahs.

Mastery is in the eye of the beholder. Mastery is in the context of what is required. If you have to perform a kata, knowing the whole thing is likely the thing that would lead you to success, if you are in a street fight – kata will likely not help you but using the techniques learned in a kata to fight will likely help you more.

 

Magickal Plateau

I was discussing this recently with a couple of associates of mine, how a lot of practitioners seems to have quiet down, and not alot of new content is coming out – mind you, this was in the context of within our own niche community but this can be taken as well in regards to the whole magickal community, and blog-o-sphere in general. I think a couple tried to get something started, promising a couple of posts a week but it has not been a substantial increase

There’s just so many variables out there that can hold down a practitioners growth; be it lack of muse, life getting in the way, responsibilities, etc but it happens, to practitioners in general as a solitary experience but can also apply in our communities.

We just run out of things to say or write, maybe we don’t want to rehash and regurgitate materials that has already been written extensively about (my personal demon of choice, lol). We run into life issues that directs are efforts in magick towards it, not leaving time to play and experiment.

I thought¬†about it and its’ kinda like the stereotype of how one deals with friends growing up; as kids, we are friends with everyone, robust environment and community surround us, and as we grow older till we reach “adulthood” – we rarely make any new friends, solidify the circle of friends you have (if any) and just go about doing your business.

If the new Star Wars Rogue One trailer has taught me anything, is that R E B E L – don’t be boring.

P.S: I would write solutions about “breaking” out of a plateau but I’m pretty sure the internet has that covered.

P.S.S: One of my friends, just quit our old job, and became a real estate agent, which I thought was cool. I always enjoy people who break out of their shell, take risk to become/reach whoever they want to be.