Demon of Slackerness

The demon of slackerness is probably the personal demon that have haunted me since youth – I mean who doesn’t like to slack off, lol. I sure do and these past few months, I’ve been enthralled by this being. We all have our own personal demons, and we all fight it out with it everyday – some has managed to work with it, some has a battle royale with it everyday of their lives.

With this one, I fall in the latter category. It just feels so good…..

Not just magickal wise, in general life as well. I still did some of the stuff that I wanted but I didn’t feel very productive, that the stuff that I did, while productive, wasn’t enriching the goals that I’ve set for myself.

But slowly, I’ve started to awaken from my slumber.

NO MORE! (kudos to whoever will connect this as a Dr Who reference, lol)

Mind you, I do get in these slumps – I’m the type who’ll go at it full swing till it tires me out. I think I’ve just been “life achieving”/”experience point farming” for so long and so hard that I eventually just burnt out and needed to not do anything, but I’ve been in a slump for far too long IMHO.

So I’ve started working on my self again; stopped working for others as a magickal worker. These past few months, I’ve devoted so much time to others – some with great success and some with failures that I can’t even being to understand as to how it occurred. But I’ve closed shop and will not likely open for public service anytime soon.

I still have a lot of things to do but I’ve slowly started back at it. Started working out again, started writing, started reading, started doing my band things, reestablishing my current practice, reading up on materials.

Doing fun magick as it was meant to be for me, while achieving everything I want in life.

See ya space cowboys!

BANG!

 

Sayonara EM Forums?

I haven’t been around the online magickal forums lately….Well, I only really dwell around a couple but one of my favorites, up to this point, has suddenly vanished.

evocationmagic.com

I haven’t really caught up with all the details but WTH man?!?!?!

EM was one of the only forums I really enjoyed still, while there has been an onslaught of crap posters, there was still real practitioners in there who share their thoughts and knowledge. As well, it was pretty diverse and most threads will spin into something interesting.

Mind you, we still get the garbage post here and there. And sometimes, I wish the mods would be more strict or around more often. But overall, that was my online haunting place…and now it’s gone.

*unhappy face*

TY Demons of the Black Pullet

This has been long overdue but I would like to say a personal thank you to the demons of the black pullet who has helped me with a certain issue of mine weeks ago. I meant to write this post of gratitude in this blog as well but have forgotten.

I really did appreciate what was done to make my life, a little bit easier, even though now – I pay the price for it.

C’est la vie. :)

07.03.2014 Project Updates

I haven’t very active in the online magickal scene recently, mostly as you can tell from the lack of posting in the interwebs and a lack of presence in the many boards I lurk around to.

I’ve stopped taken clients again, for the most part, and have dealt with everyone that was in my “books” per se.

Mostly because I’ve been trying to deal with what seemingly has piled up loose ends in my life, stuff that needs to get handled but has been forgotten or merely ignored due to tardiness (most likely the cause, I just don’t like working lol).

So my projects have split towards these little groupings (subject to change mind you);

BODY:  Been working on the little kinks that popped up during my inactivity; healing certain parts, strengthening certain parts. I’ve been meaning to lose more weight but I’m trying to figure if magick can help at all as my body is genetically one of those that loses weight with great difficulty. I will still do the dirty work but I would like magick to expedite things. Lots of things to work on in this end.

MIND: Been meditating more, focusing my will and determination, contemplating on many things, working on things to keep it sharp and focused. Will work on memory tricks eventually to help me memorize more things in a much more efficient manner.

SPIRIT: Been doing my meditation and energy work. Synchronicity is up in regards to Jupiterian, no real update in regards to the Venusian side of things though.

ACTION LIST:

  1. Work on harnessing and using Venusian forces more.
  2. Lose 60 LBS.
  3. Advance my musical career.

Lots to do so expect to see less of me, lol, online.

Perpetual N00B

I would like to say I’ve reach grandmaster mastery of everything magickal and sorcerous but I have not, even though I’ve hit the decade mark of learning and studying the arcane arts, even though I hear whispers from clients, friends and colleagues that I’ve reached a certain level of mastery, I still don’t feel it – I still feel that I am a perpetual n00b.

Those old words of Socrates really stuck to me…..

It’s not like I’m not progressing, I am, but there is still so much to learn and explore. Even my preferred choice of practice/system, I’ve barely scratched the surface.

But you know what, I kinda like it being in this state.. Always ready and eager to learn new and exciting things, ready to test and experiment the things that I have been shown, excited to try out the things that I’ve learned in the real world.

To the perpetual noob…. salut!

An Antagonist

You know what makes a great movie or a great novel? Some might say it’s the struggle of the protagonist, their journey, etc etc – but who do they come up against to reach that goal?

The Antagonist,

Without a great antagonist, there would be no source of struggle to overcome. Think of movies like Fight Club where the antagonist turned out eventually to be his own psyche. How would the movies turn out without Jack Torrence, Hannibal Lecter or even The Big Bad Wolf. What would Batman do without The Joker, Superman w/o Lex Luthor, Spidey Vs Carnage, etc.

So what makes a great antagonist then?

To sum it up, I believe that they never think they are the bad guys – that they think they are the good guys, and their belief and choices are the correct ones, and that anyone who stands in their way are the villains.

Why did I bring this little topic up then?

Yes, I brought it up because I think I’m an antagonist, that I pretty much fall into that stereotype. Some might point out that maybe I fall under the “anti-hero” clause but I disagree since anti-heroes tend to know they are doing the wrong things but justify the means with the ends.

I think that’s how I view my actions when performing magick and receiving the results of it from the universe; be it a small love spell, finance charm, or just general magick in general. I fully believe that I am right, and that my actions are correct, and that it should be done, and consequences be damn.

So really, what’s the difference between me and the bad guy, lol?

[EDIT] I should really let these rants simmer, I dislike spelling and grammar mistakes but these things just pop out of my head and my fingers do the dancing. To let it simmer would do my rants injustice, lol.

Focusing Internally, Rather Than Externally

These past few years, I’ve been so focused on manifesting my magick externally, rather than internally. Trying to visibly manifest entities, some sort  of external effect that can be replicated substantially.

I mean, I know magick words wonderfully internally but that chase to prove it externally has something that has been on every practitioners mind since the dawn of magick – to reach that new level, to finally put to sleep those lingering doubts, etc etc.

But while I was on this journey, certain bits of my life has been left unattended – which is normal for most of us, and for me as well but I am not getting any younger and my philosophy in life still stands and I will follow it till my dying breath.

an unexamined life is not worth living…..

So I must make the hard decision and move towards the future with what I have and not the potential of what I can achieve. I have to use the pragmatic and effective techniques, rather work with the showy experimental ones. I basically have to buckle down and get it done.

I write this, and actually mean it but life, spiced with magick, has a funny way of throwing chaos into the mix. As I write this, some of my external manifestations might bear fruit – who knows, lol.

So what does this mean? Nothing really will change; maybe take less clients, work more internal magick, experiment less, etc etc.

Sounds like less fun? I guess but living life is fun and the greatest high I can achieve so…I take from the universe, I give back to the universe.

C’est la vie.